What is meant for you will be yours.
Can you believe it is the end of the month? This is my last post as part of the September birthday month series where I am sharing some personal stories from this past year in hopes you can relate, be inspired, feel encouraged and take away a little piece of information that helps you in your day. This one feels the closest to my heart…
My biggest lesson this year was that there is no amount of shape shifting or effort you can do to make something that isn't meant for you work. Sometimes I cringe at sayings like this so please don't roll your eyes at me when I say that "What is meant for you will be yours." I have always believed that but I understand it on a much deeper level now. This year has shifted my perspective and made me realize that no matter how much you try to make something work -- in business, relationships, friendships -- what isn't meant for you needs to be let go.
This is where I think we go wrong:
Yes, life can require a lot of effort and can be hard at times BUT it shouldn't feel like you're shoving a square peg in a round hole. You shouldn't have to give up the bright parts of you in order to make things work out or move forward. That doesn't mean life is without compromise, collaboration, self-awareness and growth. But those things should feel like they are moving toward your purpose or goal. Not giving up pieces of you or your dreams.
As I took a chance on myself and launched my business, I had relationships in my life that didn't want to support me through this journey or celebrate with me along the way. As I moved through the highs and lows of entrepreneurship, the people I thought would be there weren't. They weren't there to support me, they didn't ask questions or cheer me on or share with their friends. They didn't bring it up when we were together - it felt like an elephant in the room that no one was talking about.
And for a while, I allowed the silence to keep the relationship.
I muted myself. I didn't talk about how excited, scared, tired, or happy I was while building this business on my own. This was such a HUGE thing in my life and I wasn't talking about it with some of the people closest to me.
This is where things got painful and it took a while for me to get there, but I finally realized that some relationships weren't meant for me anymore. That what IS meant for me wouldn't dim my light, wouldn't mute my voice, wouldn't make me be any less than who I am. Even if there are some ways those relationships were great for me, they weren’t great for the WHOLE of me.
That being me, just as I am, is enough. In fact, it's more than enough -- it is everything! I learned that the more I move away from who I am, the further away from what I am meant to do and where I am meant to be. So while this particular lesson this year has been painful, heartbreaking, and challenged many parts of me, I am so grateful that I am finally showing up with ALL of me in every aspect of my life. That I am on MY path. That showing up as I am is the best thing I can do for myself and for others. That letting go of things that don’t allow for the best version of me is part of the process of moving forward AND that is a loving thing to do for everyone involved.
So my dear friends, if you're wondering how you can stay true to YOUR path at work or at home, consider these thoughts:
If you are working with a manager or a team who makes you feel or act less than your best self, question whether that environment is the right one for you.
Surround yourself with people who celebrate your wins (and make sure you're celebrating theirs!).
Don't work harder to make a company that doesn't see you or invest in you (for a raise, promotion, project) - find a company that values you as you are and supports your continued growth plan.
If you feel like you're not living to your highest potential, invest in your development. You are worth it.
And finally, a special thank you to all the friends who are cheering loudly -- I hear you and am so incredibly grateful for you!
Your friend,
Lindsay